It is common knowledge that a bad review, can affect a writer, and because of this, a lot of people like
to “sugar coat” their reviews, sometimes afraid that they won’t be given the chance to review more
books in the future.
But I have to be honest, I can’t fool you, just like I can’t fool myself.
I received a free copy of this book via Booksprout and I am voluntarily writing this review.
This is my review on Our Two-Week, One-Night Stand.
I have to be honest from the get-go, I wanted to put this book down from the moment I stared reading
it. I considered discarding it into my DNF pile so many times. The only reason why I finished it is because
I agreed to leave a review, and I wanted it to be as honest as possible. Also my bestie @melatoninreads
was reading it too, and it ended up being a source of hoots of laughter for the both of us.
Let’s start with the obvious. The story line is completely and absolutely rushed. I am not talking about
the characters “falling in love” or “ending up in bed” quickly, that’s kind of expected in romance novels. I
am talking about the story itself. The scenarios being described do not make any sense. If you try to
picture the story in your head as you read, it just doesn’t flow. The story line is so rushed most of the
time you’re not even aware of what is going on between the characters. Only the surface is being
written, and you are forced to imagine the rest.
This is the first book I read from this author, and I have no knowledge of their background, but the
writing seems to be very much amateur. There are so many grammatical errors, I had to stop several
times, and re-read entire paragraphs to try to understand what was written. There are several errors I
am surprised were not picked up by the editor. It seems like the “find and replace” tool was used several times, and
the thesaurus was abused. I feel like this book wasn’t even reviewed, and that is a shame.
The story itself is predictable. I see the idea the author had, and I can assume they had good intentions
by it, but the writing didn’t do the story justice.
Now let’s talk about some specifics that have been grinding my gears from the moment I started reading
Cecily, the main character, is a 30 something year old woman, with an MBA, that calls her father daddy
throughout the entire book. Even though her dad is basically an asshole, she continues to call him
daddy. In what southern belle world are we living in? I am not sure. I don’t see a woman that age that is
trying so desperately to prove herself to her father calling him daddy. It doesn’t make any sense. Let’s
also add, that when her father is mentioned, he is mentioned by first and last name, the ENTIRE book.
The main male character, Lincoln. He is described as a gorgeous, 6’3” tall man with broad shoulders, and
a tiny waist.
In what world is that attractive?
A tiny waist?
Then we move on to Cecily, who is supposed to be a plus size girl. So plus size, that her ex basically
makes fun of her wright, and she expresses, at some random point in the story, that she struggled in
school growing up, because she was bullied due to her weight. As a plus size girl myself, it’s always nice
to see the inclusion, but please, whoever this writer is, she is obviously not plus size, and should had
probably done some research, or asked some simple questions before writing this book
The second time Lincoln and Cecily have sex, is in the shower. IN THE SHOWER!
What grinds my gears is that Cecily asked Lincoln to get in the shower with her. There is no way in hell
that any plus size girl would incite smut with a muscular, gorgeous, tiny waist guy, in the shower. No way
in hell. Shower smut is fun, we’ve all done it, but not this way.
Not only are they in the shower, Lincoln lifts her in the air, she wraps what I assume are her extremely
strong legs around him, and they have sex against the wall, skinny people style. To make matters worse,
this chick is able to let go of his shoulders with one hand, and she starts going at it with her free hand,
while he is holding her with what I can assume is a 2 feet long pipe of a dick.
That, ladies and gents, would NEVER happen. It’s impossible, it’s almost against all gravity laws.
When you’re plus size, feet stay on the ground, unless you want to slip and fall on your ass.
I had the laugh of a life time reading that smut scene alone.
Out of respect to all writers out there, I have to say, I understand the good intent, but it did not work
out. This book gave me a headache. The rushed scenes, the repetitiveness, and the lack of actual
sentiment, is very disappointing.
I wish this author the best, however, I do not look forward to reading any other of her books.
(As an added bonus, see some of the text messages between @melatoninreads and I
while reading this book)
If this book was meant to be a comedy, I would give it 5 stars, but since it isn’t, I will give it 1, out of
respect to the author.